New data from Yale, the leading provider of smart home security technology, polled the nation’s couples to reveal the top 20 house-related subjects that couples WISH they had agreed on, before moving in together including cleanliness, home security and finances.
What were the key findings?
Dividing the cleaning duties (32 percent), making sure surfaces are wiped down (27 percent), turning lights off (25 percent) and not leaving towels lying around (24 percent) all came high in the list.
Who pays what bill (22 percent), how often to change bedding (19 percent), taking off shoes in the house (16 percent) and the thermostat temperature (15 percent) were also important topics of conversation.
Discussions about home security also caused friction, resulting in arguments about double locking the front door at night (15 percent), not leaving keys by the front door (13 percent), locking windows rather than shutting them (11 percent) and where to store valuables (10 percent) all important conversations for couples to have. Whether to get smart security (eight percent) and if it is ok to leave valuable items in the car (eight percent) also featured highly on the list of concerns.
What’s the best way to avoid disagreements?
Over a half (59 percent) of the couples surveyed wish they’d discussed house rules with their partner before moving in together.
Relationship expert Sarah Louise Ryan said: “With over 59% of British couples arguing at least 5 times a week about “house rules” whilst it’s not sexy, it’s important to iron out the division of tasks and each other’s expectations around how things run around the house for relational wellness.”
“I always suggest couples spend one night a month (and they put it in a shared calendar) talking about the practical aspects that keep things ticking so it doesn’t dim the flame on date night. Topics such as home security would fit perfectly into the etched out time so if it’s not so sexy for couples it doesn’t dim the desire on date night.”
On average Brits argue five times a week about ‘house rules’ with the most common being around cleaning (24 percent) and leaving lights on (19 percent).
It is no surprise then that a fifth (22 percent) would advise anyone thinking about moving in together to talk about their house rules.
Said Kevin Spencer, Head of Product Management for Yale Retail UK: “This research shows just how many rows occur because couples aren’t aligned when it comes to issues like their home security, cleaning, bill paying & energy usage. At a time of the year when couples are celebrating each other’s company around Valentine’s Day, even small adjustments such as setting the alarm or double locking the door can go a long way to making your partner feel secure and these adjustments are perhaps more important to prioritise over trivial duties such as cleaning or turning the lights off – as they will ensure the home you have built together remains safer for longer.
One in two (49 percent) say being open with their partner is the best way to iron out issues once they’ve moved in – a contrast to a third (31 percent) who feel it is important for their partner to share the same values.
One in three (29 percent) try not to get annoyed with their partner when they don’t do what they want, while a quarter (24 percent) admit that their partner often drives them up the wall.
Luckily, three quarters (74 percent) say that their partner shares their view of home security.
For more information on how to keep your home secure this Valentine’s Day, visit www.yalehome.co.uk
Sarah Louise Ryan Top Tip
“If 31% of couples think that it’s important they share the same values, how would they feel about the home and the steps they take to ensure that, eg, safe and assured, shouldn’t be left to chance. Whilst it’s great to hear 74% report being on the same page about security, I feel before couples move in they should discuss it, which means they have one less thing to focus on to ensure relationship happiness and wellness. Conversations such as this should be approached consciously and practically to ensure each person within the home, as well as their belongings, are safe and secure.”
20 THINGS COUPLES SHOULD DISCUSS BEFORE MOVING IN TOGETHER – ACCORDING TO COUPLES WHO LIVE TOGETHER…
- Cleaning duties 32%
- Wiping down surfaces 27%
- Turning lights off when leaving a room 25%
- Leaving wet towels lying around 24%
- Who pays which bills 22%
- How often to change bedding 19%
- Wearing shoes around the house 16%
- Double locking the door at night 15%
- Thermostat temperature 15%
- Eating in bed 15%
- What to watch on TV 13%
- Not leaving house keys by the front door 13%
- How to load the dishwasher correctly 12%
- Locking the windows 11%
- Where to store valuables 10%
- What time bedtime should be 8%
- Whether to get smart security 8%
- Whether its ok to leave items in the car 8%
- Time off the morning alarm 7%
- Putting the BBQ/garden tools in the garage at night 7%